Tuesday, October 27, 2009
突发奇想。。。
想早点回家。。。可回到家,又不懂什么可以做。。。
笨蛋+无奈的复杂心情又来了。。。
笨蛋,找你吃早餐,因为要交待东西吧。。。还是同事厉害,会拒绝。。。觉得自己有时蛮笨一下的。。。也许不要酱想,会开心点吧。。。
自从知道自己也只是纯纯脆脆的帮手,付出的力量也大大减少了很多,很明显的。。。总感觉自己付出的得不到回报。。。可我知道,付出而不要求任何回报,才是最高境界。。。我要学习。。。学习到最高境界。。。希望我能。。。而且也要学习改变自己的脾气。。。
Sunday, October 25, 2009
久违了...
在这两个月,工作上和家庭上,都发生了不少事。。。
工作上,将会有所改变,就好像以往酱的感觉,被过桥抽板的感觉吧。。。可这应该也不是大问题,因为以我的个性,很快就会把这事情忘记的了。。。说什么天蝎座的人会很记仇,可是我呢?很快就把仇恨忘了吧。。。可能是对某些事记仇而已吧。。。可是爸那边,总感觉公司酱对他很不公平。。。要他再主治过新的经理,是个很吃力的事。。。真得以为他还年轻吗?有时很想叫他退休了。。。可自己又不争气。。。
家庭上,某个人竟然为了狗而跟妈闹翻,搞到现在妈还是好像在跟木头人说话。。。有时看到酱的情形,真得很想叫妈不要再对牛谈情了。。。可是讲出来,肯定又有的吵了。。。所以索性做哑巴。。。而自己,也没办法跟妈摊开胸怀谈话,可能这是我一贯的作风,从小到大都是这样。。。更不要讲现在。。。有时很羡慕那些可以跟妈妈谈心的人。。。酱的事我肯定做不到。。。更不明白的是,那个人竟然可以酱幼稚,拜托,都几岁人了。。。简直对他无言。。。
不知不觉,十一月就要到了。。。很害怕这个月的到来。。。为什么呢。。。因为家人的关系搞到不上不下。。。而我不会怎样做做。。。然我很害怕某某大日子,是要一起坐下吃饭的那一天。。。譬如生日,新年。。。我无法当作什么都没发生过,然后还假装开怀大笑。。。真得觉得很假。。。更害怕的是,又是孤单的生日了。。。又要老一年了。。。为什么我总要那么悲观的想法呢?很多朋友告诉我,我还有她们。。。我也知道,我还有她们。。。可这样,还是没办法改变我的思想。。。我也希望自己可以乐观点。。。应该会比较快乐吧。。。
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
失落沙州。。。
心情不好,果然工作效率满了一大半。。。虽然说,可以暂时忘记。。。可是难免还会想起。。。
朋友都问我。。。是谁让我那么生气了?哪个‘烂摊’。。。?怎么讲呢?全部摊出来吗?真得不知如何说起。。。
遇到一个好朋友,兼同事,兼蛮像我的妹妹,说她姐也是酱的。。。没有顾虑到她还有个阿嘛在,一直叫她去新加坡做工。。。而她,就也像我,得考虑到自己家人。。。我们俩,都需要勇气吧。。。可是她们,当她们做决定时,为什么不会考虑这些的呢?为什么她总不会反省一下自己的行为,再来给人说教。。。她有那个资格吗?我真得不觉得有。。。
自己驾车回家时,听见收音机播放'徐佳莹的失落沙洲。。。很好听。。。这种时候,听了特别有感觉。。。刚好我的download 大王朋友,很久以前就有这首歌了。。。要他send 了给我。。。反复听了好多次。。。泪水又不自禁的来找我。。。
哥哥说,人生也是没什么目标。。。可能想要去读博士。。。读博士,我从来都没想过。。。因为我真得没兴趣读下去了。。。很想顺便告诉她,我有可能去别地方工作。。。可是,情绪来时。。。再加上还没整理好自己到底要怎样。。。所以说不出口。。。
《失落沙洲/徐佳瑩》
又來到這個港口沒有原因的拘留
我的心乘著斑駁的輕舟 尋找失落的沙洲
隨時間的海浪漂流 我用力張開雙手
擁抱那麼多起起落落 想念的還是你望著我的眼波
我不是一定要你回來 只是當又一個人看海
回頭才發現你不在 留下我迂迴的徘徊
我不是一定要你回來 只是當又把回憶翻開
除了你之外的空白 還有誰能來教我愛
又回到這個盡頭我也想再往前走
只是愈看見海闊天空
愈遺憾沒有你分享我的感動
我不是一定要你回來 只是當又一個人看海
疲憊的身影不是我 不是你想看見的我
我不是一定要你回來 只是當獨自走入人海
除了你之外的依賴 還有誰能教我勇敢
除了你之外的空白 還有誰能來教我愛
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BAbQQ8ICkGU
。。。
是谁让我想到出去见识自己前,还要想得那么多的。。。还要想想我那可怜又渐渐年老的父母,而且到了退休年龄,还得为了这个家在拼?
是谁让我每做一个决定,都要照顾他们的感受呢?
而又是谁让我担心我做了那个决定,而们会没有人照顾。。。??? 我不像别人家庭。。。
就算是家里最大的,还有三个弟弟可以依靠,对父母也彬彬有礼的。。。很羡慕他们一家可以那么融洽。。。。
就算是家里最小的,可有几个本事的姐姐哥哥,虽然说不是全部都好,可是至少好有几个可以依靠。。。就算做任何决定,都有老公陪着,都有姐姐撑着。。。
就算是家里的老大姐,可还有几个孝顺的弟弟陪在身旁。。。虽然有时会吵吵闹闹,可都是家常便饭了。。。吵过就算了。。。爸爸还有可以依靠的好女儿,好儿子。。。
就算也是家里最小的,也可以无时无刻作决定,决定去新加坡做工,父母还有三个哥哥可以照顾。。。放心的下。。。跟哥哥的感情虽然说没有100分,也应该有99.9分。。。
是谁让我需要考虑那么多的呢?又是谁让我,每当看到别人的幸福家庭,都回不自禁的感叹了一下。。。怎么自己的不是酱?我知道,我不该拿来跟别人比,可是很难免会让我酱想。。。
不是每个人都可以酱自私的做出那种决定。。。不顾别人的感受。。。至少我不行。。修行100年都不行。。。所以才会那么烦恼吧。。。。
Monday, July 27, 2009
penang trip...~_~
most of my friend say how come i so enjoy... can take a week... hmmm... maybe since i start work... i never go anywhere for few days vacation like this liao... so this time... one time take all... wakakaka... but still got left balance annual leaves leh... hohoho...
and many people asking us... penang got so many things mer??? how come can stay so long time??? at first i also think like this... but when we was there... and busy visiting all the famous places... you will realize its actually ngam ngam hao a week to visit all the places... by bus i mean... like local backpack... wakakaka...
the following is our journey for the past fews days in penang...
Day 1
start our journey to penang from klang around 11.30a.m.... stop at ipoh... to take our lunch... which is the famous duck wantan mee ( heard people say de lar )... but the taste is really not bad... especially the duck meat... kekeke... bought some 'siou pao' and ' wu kok' for our collegue in penang sales office... mana tahu... at last realize the seller give wrong liao... -_-"... both also 'wu kok' lai de... za dao... but taste not bad...
after visiting them, we went for dinner at a so called very tasty bihun stall... order bihun, lala and a fish and drinks is so called 'lao hao' in hokkien and buah pala in malay taste a bit sour... but my friend like it... me... okok nya... food also thumb up... altough not much people the time we eat... maybe too early...~_~"
at night... too tired for anything... went to sleep early so that we got enough strength for the next day... planned our journey before we go to sleep....!
Day 2
journey to Georgetown... hehe... all the way by bus... and with the information we surveyed before we go for it... take bus number... any number... and it will go direct to the terminal either jetty or Komtar... then all those temple and heritage places is super near... can be reach by walking distance... too many temple... too many heritage building... some is really near... and some we walk till leg also super pain... but we went most of it... yeh....!!! Cheah Kongsi, Penang museum and Art Gallery, Dr. Sun Yat Sen's Penang Base, Fort Cornwallis(didn't go in... -_-"), town hall, city hall,Acheen Street Mosque, Khoo Kongsi( didn't go in as well... ~_~"), Han jiang Ancestral Temple, Blue Mansion ( unable to go in liao... cos we reach after the visiting hour... which is 10am to 3pm...) toooooooo many almost same kind of temple and building... we took photo's on most of it... cos if not mistaken, this is the 1st time we visit all after 10 years time before... wakakaka... mission accomplish...
and we prepare ourself to Thai Seafood in Butterworth... which having dinner with our Penang Sales Office collegue... named Kun Thai Seafood Restaurant... if not mistaken... special vege... fried kangkung... haha... they ordered many different kind of seafood... one of it is cham cham la la de i think... dunno wat name liao... super spicy loh... then my lips become sausage again after drink the kuah... haha... happy they still spend the dinner with us... and thanks my friends all...
opps... picture to be upload later... as its using my friend's camera...
and journey to be continue~_~... need to sleep liao...
A new day again... which we plan to visit to batu ferrighi that side... 1st we went to Butterfly farm... which actually not only butterfly inside... but also many other kind of species... geli de also got... pretty de also got... and most pretty and main point of course is the different kind of butterfly... walk whole farm... took some random pictures... and get to finish up the 'coping' work there... yeh...
Due to the farm is actually quite inner part from batu ferringhi beach... only few buses will go until there... the time when we are going back... we nearly nearly get cheated by the taxi driver... cheat us that the rapid penang bus will only come every 2 hours... ah ceh... luckily we so clever... waited for another few minutes... if not... already kena cut liao... haha...
then we headed to batu feringhi beach... but... we didn't prepare anything to play water... even so hot... haha... so we just have a look on the beach... many activities actually... really need to find one whole day for that... so we just look look.. then go off jor...
Lunch... Kfc... can't find any other thing to eat that time... went Eden Parade which is just opposite the batu feringhi beach... funny right... go Penang eat Kfc... -_-"
Then its about 4p.m. something... heading to Botanic Garden... which... also a place that less Rapid Penang bus will go in... there is only 101 bus... -_-"... we are so lucky 'meet' that bus... haha... but at last... found... inside.... nothing to c... due to both of us so tired of walking already... we paid RM2 to sit on the car to bring us go around... haha... even more happy with that... only RM2... hoho... better description, its actually a good place to exercise... no matter morning or evening time... good luck not always with us sometimes... we waited almost half and hour for A bus to come in the Botanic Garden... haha... even think of walking out already... haiz... so scare we can't get any buses that time... but luckily... hehe
Heading to the interesting place... which is Toy Museum... is the place both of us wanted to go since the 1st day... at least more interesting than the Botanic Garden i think... hehe... suitable for adult or kids... and we realize it is actually at the Copthorn Orkid Hotel there... this is the hotel we went for our staff workshop on Jan '09... but surprisingly... we didn't realize it!... za dao -_-"
a bit exciting to visit to the hotel again... haha... we took picture in front of the hotel... which actually suppose to do it 6 months ago... but we didn't... ganti balik... wakakaka......
see she so happy come back the same place as we training 6 months ago...~~
okok... Toy Museum... we are coming...! 1st with the opening... Ninja Turtle... in front of the entrance... hehe... took pic with 'him'... so excited... !!! then inside... opps... how to describe... so many many many toys... i think we had took 100 ++ pictures inside... omg... luckily memory is enough... haha... for more pictures, please visit to my facebook account... username ---> dennise lim... wakakaka...... experience the toy world there...
We took pictures until the closing hour... think the boss almost nearly chase us out... haha... took any bus back from the place... happy day with so many toys.... :p rach home about 11p.m. tiring but happy day~_~ missed out Day 2, Day 3 and Today on the chance to take picture on the Suntech Building... which it will have different lights at night time... but i think end about 10p.m. tomorrow must take it... :0
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Day 5
today is the day we planned to go those places that we planned earlier, but didn't go for it, because lack of time... 1st... the reclining buddha... any another 2 temple just opposite the road... I have actually visit those place .... i think 10 years or 5 years ago... hehe... but... not much differences... took some picture there... after i make a wish... (zai zai's song -_-")
then we took bus to the place near Jetty... which is Marina Bay... its actually a place for them who 'park' their ship... so suang... if only i got one... haha... took some random pictures again there... as not much thing there...
Took ferry to Butterworth which heading to Bird Farm at Butterworth… somewhere there… the time we reach already about 4p.m…. and after took our lunch at the kopitiam… heading to the bird farm… with our ‘cong ming cai zhi’…reach jor… haha…
Also is a farm… like butterfly farm… but this time is many many different kind of bird… also we fast fast walk inside… (because already super tired after walking from the kopitiam to this bird farm, which took us about 20 minutes to reach)… took also random pictures… cos too many kind jor… heading to the souvenir shop… and bought some souvenir to my friends… and…. Meet my friend after that… yeah… cos we no need to walk already… he got car…. Wakakaka… so happy…
Its my degree penang fren… quite sometimes didn’t meet him since the last time he came to kl time square to meet us… didn’t change much… but he keep on mentioned he fat jor… -_-“… fren, dun think too much ya… as I always say ‘ if u think u consider fat, then there won’t be any other really fat ppl that can called fat de liao, ok…” kekeke…
He bring us for seafood dinner… which somewhere at tambun… according to him… there is many different restaurant for nice seafood… but he prefer that one… opps… forgot to take photo jor…-_-“ ordered quite many different kind of seafood, which the most I like is the ‘lai liu ha’… never eat before mar…. sua gu lo… and the crab also not bad… yummy yummy… he some more so good… didn’t go dinner with his family( cos that day according to him, is his sister’s birthday)… but come and accompany us… and some more paid for the whole restaurant( but not including the TV) because for us… haha… cos there is no other customer that day… -_-“ haha… thanks ya thiam siew… so yao yi hei… hohoho

After the dinner, he drove us to go around whole Butterworth, I think… busy explaining to us where got nice food… and here is where and so on… haha… we are busy noted noted… and heading to
Drop us at the place we stay… and its about 12a.m. already… really thanks to him for accompany us whole night… really
Day 6
Our collegue in
Then we went to
After the movie… heading up to the hill… again … to the
After the sunset… both of us kl people…. By walking distance to the pasar malam along the batu ferrighi road… to add up souvenirs to our dear fren… walked so far…. And so long… and so tired… haha… and my playful fren… because drink jor some alcohol drinks… omg…. And add up waiting for us… sleep in the car jor…. So scary…. One gal…. sleep in the car…. Alone… park her car beside the road… can u image… ??? my dear friend…. Next time really dun do that already ok…. It is so dangerous u know… I can’t replace a daughter to

But anyway, thanks to her also…. Cos accompany us for whole day jor… luckily got her to bring us go around … hehe… and thanks for all her meals… treating us…
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Day 7
Happy day passes fast… its time to say bye bye to penang again… its Sunday…. Day to go back to KL…. Starts our working life again… happy week in
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Thursday, July 9, 2009
一发不可收拾?
我与她。。。因为工作。。。我得帮忙她。。。就好像无时无刻的帮。。。当她在时,可以让我有过度紧张的感觉。。。我跟她说话时,一定要在她没有做其他东西时,要不然我就得重复又重复我所要表达的。。。这感觉真的好累。。。为什么我总得酱符合她叻?有时真得很累。。。可每当想到她不幸的遭遇时,我就会比较让步。。。等她做完她的东西时,再跟她讲。。。要不然就不出声。。。跟她讲过了这是坏习惯。。。可好像都没听进去。。。当她不在时,也总给我感觉她在。。。会有很多交待。。。东西南北。。。通过电话。。。-_-" 有时真得透不过气。。。 渐渐的,让我觉得,我一个人,我会开心一点。。。我知道这样想很不好。。。可是内心深处想的,又有谁能猜到呢。。。? 有时变得我看到他,或接到她的电话,会很怕。。。也会有种不想接的感觉。。。很坏吧。。。到底怎么可以克服这样的感觉呢?只要跟工作没关系时,这种感觉就会不纯在了。。。难道。。。?
他与他。。。也是因为工作。。。高层与高层。。。在工作上难免会有磨擦。。。我明白的。。。可有时就是很怕。。。他们到最后会不爽彼此。。。也会因而把原有的关系切断。。。到时真的是一发不可收拾了吧?